master of the monstrous, discoverer of the unconscious. i'm k.p.k. Tiny Rainbow

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    "

    dear alexis,
    i love you more than anything
    in the universe, and i want you
    to know that that includes little
    local coffee shops and stamps
    that can’t be found anywhere
    but old corner stores where
    they should be worth hundreds
    but they are sold for dimes and the
    tails airplanes leave when they
    are chasing bigger things
    and i’ve heard that you’re doing
    well and i want you to know that
    i, too, am doing the best that
    i can, especially on days when
    i feel as if i have poured rocks
    in through my ears and crawled
    in with my underwear for a ride
    in the washing machine.

    dear alexis,
    i love you more than anything
    in this world and sometimes that’s
    a terrifying thing to feel because
    my heart’s less than one quarter of
    who i am and i feel so small sometimes
    and i wonder if maybe love is a
    concept created by companies that
    sell things made out of lace and
    latex and chocolate and i’m scared
    that i’m going to wrap myself around
    you like a boa constrictor and swallow
    you whole and i don’t think you’d like
    that much because it would take
    a long time to digest you and it would
    be very dark in there.

    dear alexis,
    i love you more than anything in
    this whole country and i don’t mean to
    be unpatriotic but i don’t understand
    politics and i know loving you isn’t
    even legal every where that it should
    be but it’s getting late and i wish
    you would come home now please
    come home because if you’re out
    of arms reach then you’re too far away
    and i am terrible at directions.
    i thought i had been taking wrong turns
    my whole life but i must have done
    something right to have wound up
    meeting you.

    dear alexis,
    i love you more than anything in
    this whole town and this town is where
    i was born and where i was raised
    and where my family lives and the
    reason i exist. i owe everything i am
    to this town because it’s where my
    parents met and decided to have me
    and i’m thinking that i should thank
    them because that simple act
    is the reason i’m around to love you
    the way that i do, in ways where
    it feels like i’ve been laying down for
    sixteen hours and then i stand straight
    up and i black out for a good four
    or five seconds and i’m floating
    through space but things are okay
    because although i feel crazy and
    dizzy and out of control, my feet are
    still firmly planted on the ground and
    i am here and i’m not going anywhere.

    dear alexis,
    i love you more than anything in
    my whole house. i love you more than the
    crappy art i’ve made that hangs
    half-finished on my walls and i love
    you more than my favourite food that
    sits tauntingly from my freezer and
    i love you more than the bathtub that
    allows me to have the bubble baths
    you and i adore so much and i love you
    more than the bed that hugs me
    tenderly every night and i love you more
    than my watch collection. you are my
    favourite piece of art and my favourite
    food and my favourite bath and my
    favourite bed and my favourite watch
    and i don’t care if it doesn’t make
    sense because you are my favourite
    everything and that’s what matters.
    you are my favourite.

    dear alexis,
    i love you more than anything that
    i have in me and everything i have to offer
    but i want you to know that i have
    so much in me and i know you’re going
    to pick through me bit by bit because
    you are the one person that believes
    there is a speck of gold amongst
    the dust and coal that i am and
    no longer wish to be.

    "
    dear alexis, kpk

    671 notes

    paingel:

pAY ATTENTION TO ME

a selfie to show u guys I&#8217;m still alive
    "

    I’ve heard that the first
    time you fall in love,
    you stop growing as
    a singular person and
    instead learn how to
    evolve with what is
    in front of you,
    like the trees that grow
    in loopedy-loops through
    corporate windows and
    flowers desperately sprouting
    through the cracks of the sidewalk.

    I’ve heard that the first
    time you fall in love,
    you revert to a childlike
    state of dependency,
    where Freud believes the
    first stage of the personality
    develops through the
    ever-hungry need for oral
    satisfaction. When you were
    a baby, you had your thumb
    in your mouth but now you’ve
    got a tongue down your throat
    and you don’t tell them that
    you’re a big girl and you’ve
    moved past that.

    I’ve heard that the first
    time you fall in love,
    you ignore that enough is
    enough. Your hands are
    sweating and clammy but you
    won’t let theirs go. Every touch
    is a thunderstorm in itself and
    you understand why people stick
    knives in power outlets
    because if liking electricity
    makes you sick you feel as if
    you never want to get better.

    People spend their whole
    lives searching for the person
    that will fold their laundry
    the way they like it but
    the point is I forgot
    a part of myself on your
    bedroom floor and I can’t
    find the courage to ring
    your doorbell so you can
    let me in to get it.

    "
    k.p.k, Done

    1,896 notes

    "As much as I let something go,
    it never really leaves me.
    I want to believe I’m moving on
    but I found myself sitting in the
    shower again thinking that I
    I can wash my hands thirty
    times a day and still find dirt
    under my fingernails."
    internal, kpk

    2,572 notes

    "I may not know how to tell you
    that I love you, but I know
    how to say that I want to plant
    seeds in the wrinkles around
    your eyes that you get when
    you smile and I know that I
    want to be around long enough
    to see each seed bloom."
    What I Almost Said to My Girlfriend Today, kpk

    1,620 notes

    
we are advertisements for men like you, kpk
    "When your daughter comes home
    crying and she won’t tell you why,
    it’ll be easy to assume that a teacher
    gave her a failing mark or that somebody
    shot her with a rude remark, or a
    boy or girl punched her right in the
    chest and shattered her heart but when
    your daughter comes home crying
    and won’t tell you why, remember
    your parents and the things they
    assumed when you came home with
    eyes almost swollen shut and
    remember that she is not selfish
    or inconsiderate for shutting you
    out from what is shutting her down.
    Remember that you are more than
    a roof over her head, but you
    are supposed to be the shelter
    around her heart."
    On Parenting, kpk

    2,692 notes

    i don&#8217;t know if i&#8217;ve posted this before but this is one of my favourite pictures and it was our eight month anniversary yesterday and i love her so much

    i smiled and laughed so much today and i got a 96% on my biology midterm and i’m going to ask my dad to drive me to starbucks so i can get my markout and a reward for my hard work and i don’t have work or homework tonight i just feel at peace

    how was your day today?

    124 notes

    
kpk, complicate